The idea of win-win outcomes is seductive, it implies that everybody gets what they want. This belief can harm you for three reasons:
- You cannot know what a win means for the other party. After all, negotiation 101 teaches us that one should never reveal their goals to the other person.
- Life is not a zero sum game, but neither does it provide unlimited resources. You are competing for the same resources.
- This only works if the other person is playing the same game, otherwise you will get slaughtered.
Better to aim for “satisfied – satisfied.” More realistic.